Q: Does the brown Poodle retrieving have three diseases?
A: No. If you look closely you will see the three different ducks do.
Q: What if my Poodle is a rescue dog and I have no registration papers?
A: Indicate that fact in the space provided on Form 1.
Q: My Poodle died many years ago before the existence of the modern test. His vet says he is sure of the diagnosis nevertheless. Should he sign Form 3?
A: Yes. His diagnosis is adequate.
Q: I put my dog's registration paper under my dog and he peed on it. Should I send it anyway?
A: Urine a whole lot of trouble if you do.
Q: Can I register my Rottiepoo? He's very cute.
A: The fee is $500 in small unmarked bills.
Q: How do I register my displeasure with the PHR?
A: Use the 3 forms like everybody else, and be sure to capitalize the name of your Damn Dog.
Q: How do I register a complaint about Roger Brucker?
A: His complaint registration service has been moved offshore. Try Bangladesh 8221-696-4213. If busy, keep trying.
Q: Has the Poodle Health Registry been approved by Attorney General Ashcroft?
A: Yes, provided you register a male and female breeding pair each time.
Q: I am blind; can somebody read the forms to me?
A: Ask your seeing eye Poodle to read the forms to you.
Q: I don't see my disease listed on your forms. What should I do?
A: Rejoice, rejoice! They found a cure last month.
Q: My Poodle is white with round black spots and smooth hair. What should I do?
A: Call the fire department and ask if Sparky is missing.
Q: Can I register my French Poodle?
Q: My Poodle is a Cadaver Dog. How do you treat that?
A: We normally send flowers to the funeral home.
Q: We live on a farm and my Poodle likes to roll in cow shit. Is this normal?
A: What do your cows like to roll in?
Q: I am Serious that We should Not allow parti-colored Poodles in the PHR. Are you?
A: You're Serious? I'm Roebuck. Who is watching the store?